Devil or Angel
by BootsOfDespair
Summary: He's a shinigami and she's dying...I do not own d.gray-man...inspired by Nageku Shinigami...AllenXLenalee forever
1. PROLOGUE

**Sorry again with my English...I hope you guys will enjoy my story...**

**Do not own -Man**

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PROLOGUE

I'm born like this, I'm what I am and I live with what I believe in, I believe and live as a shinigami (God of Death). Allen Walker, 9 yrs old and a shinigami. The Black Soul Society a place where souls go after they went out of their physical body, this society is compose of two layers. The shinigami and the normal souls. It's the shinigami's duty to get the soul before the soul become lost or worst becomes an Akuma. But there's also a different place for the pure soul and that is the heaven, but not all humans have pure soul. People who suppose to die will die, and those people who suppose to live will live. That's what I learn and I believe. As a shinigami I'll do my very best to fulfill my duty.

"The clock is ticking, there's a new soul to be taken" a girl with black and wavy hair said while looking at her clock

"Miranda-san, Let Allen do that job" A man with red hair and a mask covering half his face said in a serious tone.

"Are you sure about that? Allen is-"

"Don't worry Miranda-san I can do it, I'm 9yrs old now" A boy appeared behind her, he have white hair and a scar running through his left face until it reached his forehead that forms an inverted star

"Allen, as my disciple take that persons soul, that will be your first job" He said while pouring some wine onto his empty glass. Sipping a little "But first you need to go to the higher ups to get your golem that will guide you in finding that person"

"Yes, Master" Allen said with a blank reaction as if it's glued on his face. Allen leave after that

"Cross-sama, Allen-kun is..." Miranda looked at the boy with worry imprinted on her face. Cross can only look at her _'I never seen him smile or make any kind of reaction. He's always alone…'_

"He's like a puppet, an emotionless puppet" Cross answered her, making her tremble "Is that what you're thinking right now? Miranda"

"I think that his first duty will help him become a new person" Cross said watching the boy's back slowly fading into darkness

"I hope your right Cross-sama"

***BootsOfDespair***

After an hour Allen received the mission that is to make sure that the soul will not be a lost soul or a demon, and in order to do that he have to get that person's soul. The ceremony of catching a soul is easy, before the person die you must kiss that person, and for Allen to be assigned to that job it means the person is a girl.

A round, golden yellow, bird-like object nested on Allen's silver-white hair

"Timcanpy, let's go" with just a snap of Allen's hand they vanished without a trace.

***BootsOfDespair***

They arrived at the busy city of London in exactly 9:00 p. m. Timcanpy flutters around still looking for the reaction, after looking all over the city Timcanpy stopped at a hospital.

Allen followed Timcanpy and saw a girl gazing out of the window. Hers orbs are violet and her hair is dark green and slightly shinning because it reflects the moonlight. She looks like the same age as Allen. The girl revert her gaze and look at Allen who is floating, Allen approached the girl.

"Are you an angel?" the girl asked

"No, I'm a shinigami... " Allen walks closer towards the girl's bed.

"Are you here to take away my life?"

"You're the one who is confined here?"

"Yes. The doctors said I'm going to die, sooner or later"

"If I kiss you now, it will be easier for you"

"If you kiss me I'll be dead in just a snap?"

"Yes" _'If I kiss her now she'll die quick and without pain' _

There is only an inch until their lips touch but the girl started to chuckle making him stop.

"Why didn't you stop me?" Allen asked looking at the girl with his usually expressionless face. The girl smiled and said "Let's start as friends" the girl offered her hand to Allen "I'm Lenalee Lee"

Allen just looked at her and looks at Timcanpy who is sniffing the girl's beds fabric.

"Timcanpy let's go!" Timcanpy fly towards Allen and again with a snap they vanished before the girl's eye

***BootsOfDespair***

_'That girl doesn't she fear me, doesn't she fear death'_ Allen said while looking the clock that Miranda handed him _'she doesn't have much time left'_

"Timcanpy! We'll go back there tomorrow, same time as today" Timcanpy nodded in agreement

***BootsOfDespair***

Allen entered inside of the room while Timcanpy flutters quickly and land on the hospital bed. The girl is just standing beside the bed as if waiting for him to arrive

"Hello, as I expected you'll be back at this time again...Let's play something" Lenalee brimmed with smile while Allen answers her smile with a blank face

"Uhmm...So what's your name?"

"Allen" he said in a plain tone "Why are you up until now...you know you suppose to rest when you're weak"

"The doctor said its fine since..." Lenalee said in a fading tone.

"So what are we going to play?" Allen asked

"Umh...how about you telling me what's your country look like?" she puts a smile on her face again "what's the difference between the human world and your world?"

"Why are you so interested?"

"Because I want to be ready, when I get there, and wanted to know how Allen-kun lives like" she smiled at Allen making him blush

"The world I came from…"

Lenalee watched at the boy with an eye of anticipation "There are normal souls and there are some Shinigami…When I was 6 yrs old I died and sent to the Black soul Society. I don't know anything of my past. I didn't even know who my family is. In the Black Soul Society I have a foster father but after a year the higher ups said I'm going to be a shinigami" _'What am I doing I have to get her soul…but.."_

"Allen-kun please continue" Lenalee pleaded with her eyes getting teary. She doesn't know if it's because of the story or it's because she's already tired and wanted to sleep. She gave out a little yawn

Allen sigh before continuing his story "Only with those with exceptional soul can be a shinigami and when they found out that my soul is very unusual, they take me to their headquarter, there I learn almost everything I know right now"

Allen stopped talking when he saw the girl is past asleep. Breathing peacefully as if she doesn't have any troubles, her face is very calm as if not afraid what tomorrows bring.

"Timcanpy, it's time to go"

***BootsOfDespair***

"Allen-kun you leave yesterday and didn't even say goodbye" she said in a tone of complain

"That's because you're sleeping"

"Umm…yeah I wanted to give this to you" Lenalee let out a jar with a small light flickering on and off.

"What's that?" Allen questioned while staring at the jar with a strange being

"It's a firefly! You don't have this in your world?" Lenalee handed Allen the jar and he accepted it still staring with an amaze look on his face

"It's my first time seeing something like this"

***BootsOfDespair***

And so days have passed, Allen is always going to the hospital at the same time 9:00 p.m and leaves at 10:00p.m. As if Lenalee is making sure Allen leaves exactly 10:00 o'clock she always sleeps leaving Allen with no choice but to leave.

***BootsOfDespair***

"Allen why aren't you taking the girl's soul yet" Cross asked while sipping some wine

"I'll get it tomorrow" He answered

"You only have two days remaining before the girl die" with another sip of his wine "Get her soul or just let her die? Anyway she'll die either way"

_'what's wrong with me...whenever I see her smile I just can't get her soul out..._' he mentally said to himself. So Allen decided to go there later

***BootsOfDespair***

11:00p.m

Allen and Timcanpy arrived at the human world exactly 11:00p.m _'She's probably asleep at this kind of hour'_. When Allen is about to land at her room he saw a particular silhouette at the roof top. 'It's Lenalee, what is she doing there?'

Allen landed on the roof top

"Allen-kun you're late..." she said while pouting

"What are you doing here...you are suppose to be in the hospital room" Allen said putting on a concern look on his face

Lenalee didn't say anything but she runs toward Allen and hugs him. Allen was taken aback by the action

"Allen-kun I just wanted to see you smile...that's the only expression I haven't seen on your face" she said while tightening her hold of Allen "Will you smile at me tomorrow?" Allen stayed quiet the whole time and Lenalee let go.

"What are you talking about?"

"Allen-kun, the doctor said that mother, brother and me have to say our goodbyes"

Allen answered her with silence

"I think I don't have enough time" She said while holding back her impending tears.

"Allen-kun, don't be late tomorrow okay?"

For the first time Allen wished something and for the first time he wished something he never thought he would wish _'I'm sorry, I just wish that I'm an angel and not a God of Death…I wanted to bring you life but what can I do'_

***BootsOfDespair***

Allen is now headed to Lenalee's room at 9:00 p.m, but when he arrived at the hospital he saw Lenalee crying and curled in her bed. He approached her and hugs her

"Allen-kun you're already here"

"Are you afraid to die?" He asked

"No"

"Then why are you crying?"

"Because I don't want my brother to cry so I'll cry for him instead" she said while Allen let her go

Allen tapped Lenalee's head gently and smile. Lenalee saw the sincerity of Allen's smile, it's the first and last time she'll be able to see his smile.

"I'll contact you when I get there…" Lenalee said

"There's no telephone in the Black Soul Society"

"Then I'll just send you a letter"

"It's impossible since we don't know if you're really going there or you'll head towards heaven"

Allen leans toward her face but Lenalee pulls Allen closer until their lips touch

"No matter what you'll be my first and last kiss…" Lenalee said in a fading tone

A bright light showered the whole room for a second and the next thing is a girl lying unconscious at the floor and a boy shedding some tears.

***BootsOfDespair***

Allen heads toward the headquarters with a sad look on his face. _'if were an angel…I should have given you life instead of killing you'_

"Allen-kun a mail just got here" Miranda called out and Allen rushed towards her

"It's from heaven" Miranda said while handing Allen the letter.

"From heaven?" He asked with a surprise

_Letter_

_To the God of Death,_

_Thank you for always looking for my daughter. Even though she lied to you for me, she really likes you and wanted to be friends with you. Please forgive my daughter Lenalee._

"Allen-kun, the truth is Lenalee is not the person to die" after hearing her words Allen's heart started to throb _'Why?'_

"Allen-kun, apparently Lenalee wanted her mother to live and so she wanted to give her life to her. But it's decided so nothing can change the fact that her mother is going to die. It's a futile attempt"

'_She lied to me…why…are all the humans so selfish…no one can cheat death' _Allen clench his fist

"She's stupid" he muttered under his breath. _'I thought she's different…humans never learn that they cannot and will never cheat death'_

In the rules of Shinigami, they cannot get a soul that has plenty more years to come. But if a shinigami made a mistake in doing the ceremony that persons soul will not be taken but she/he'll just lose his/her memory with the shinigami_  
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**So what do you think? Will I continue this or not...should I just delete this?**_  
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	2. New Life

**ALLENxLENALEE...I THINK I'M GETTING BETTER IN CONSTRUCTING A SENTENCE AND MAKING STORIES**

**HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY THIS CHAPTER**

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Six years had passed after my first mission and my first failure as a shinigami. Everything change, the technology arises in the human world and so as in the Dark Soul Society. Right now Dark Soul Society can identify the person that is going to die soon and can clearly see how many days will they be able to live. And little by little I started to change, from the dull person to a livelier young lad. But deep in me there is something that I wanted to change something that really hurts me.

Allen looked at the girl who's lying on the street and covered in blood. Allen approached the girl and look at his golden golem, it opened its mouth and it showed a sand clock the upper part is almost coming to its end. He slowly and gently lift the girls' body so she's facing him. The girl is still alive but it will soon stop because it's her time to go.

"I'm sorry I couldn't do anything for you" he said in a sad tone and tears started to emerge from his eyes. The girl looked up to him with her eyes half close. In the girls' hand is a beautifully wrapped gift box, she handed the box to Allen and smiled "What is this for?" Allen asked

"The time you gave me is so limited that I have to rush buying this" the girl said and closed her eyes "Don't worry, I'm already ready for this" she said and tear rolls down her pale skin. Allen gently kissed the girl on the cheek and a bright light illuminated both of them.

'_I don't know how many times I did this in different person; I cannot count the people I saw dying...and because of them I learn how to cherish life and also because of those peoples I learned that one day your life will flash before your eyes. That's why make sure it's worth watching.'_

"Tim. The ceremony is completed I already got her soul" The golden golem nodded in reply

"We're going to head back to Dark Soul Society" Allen said while wiping some of his tears. Allen looks at the lifeless form of the girl for the last time and look at the gift box.

Allen is maybe mourning but he's still aware of his surrounding, he can feel someone else presence but before Allen could turn around a red haired man glomps him.

"Allen you've finish your mission" the red haired man with eye patch on right eye said.

"L-Lavi, What are you doing here?" He asked

"You're super late…I know that you're waiting for that girl's life to the extent but sometimes you just have to do it faster you know" Lavi said in the most energetic way he could

"That's what she like…I wanted her to have more time to enjoy herself until she's finally ready" Allen said while putting his mourning face again while remembering the girl's last day

_Flashback_

_"Allen, you're telling that you're a shinigami and here to take my life?" The girl asked in a confusion_

_"Yeah...That's true..."_

_"So can I ask you Mr. Shinigami how much longer will I live?"_

_"Today is your last day" Allen said while averting his view to the other way afraid to see the girl before him cry.  
_

"_You're telling me that it's my last day?" the girl said without even tearing up_

"_Yes, I'm sorry about the bad news" Allen said and the girl just smiled at him._

"_Don't worry it's not as if you're at fault"_

"_Still...I'm sorry"_

"_So for the meantime I just have to enjoy my remaining hours…Allen-kun meet me at the park at 7pm sharp okay" with that the girl run leaving Allen and tim._

"_Tim. She's just acting strong?" Tim just nodded to him_

_At exactly 7pm Allen waited on the bench of the park for 15 mins but he cannot wait anymore because the girl is never been late in any meeting so he decided to go to the girls' house. On his way he saw a car that's going on a zigzag, it looks like the break is broken and before he knew it the car bumped a girl and is now knocked down on the ground bathing on her own pool of blood._

_End of Flashback_

Lavi patted Allen's back "Moyashi-chan, you have a new mission coming up that's why I'm here"

"Don't call me that!" Allen glared and Lavi smiled because he succeeded in cheering up the young lad.

* * *

Allen and Lavi came back to the headquarters to receive their new missions; Miranda is the one who meet them at the gate.

"Allen-kun welcome back, the soul is finally at the normal zone division" Miranda greeted

"I'm back Miranda-san, I heard that I have a new mission?"

"Yes, Allen-kun follow me" the older woman lead Allen and Lavi to the headquarters office where Allen's master is waiting.

"Allen, the next one is not going to be easy" Cross said with a serious face

"Why?"

"Reever will explain it to you" a man with blonde hair appeared with handbooks in his hands. He handed the booklet to Allen

"You see, this soul is a special soul that person must have experience near death experience and escaped it" Reever stated

"You mean that person cheated death?" Lavi exclaimed

"No, that's not exactly it. But that person tried to cheat death but failed, but that person is given another chance. But this time it's for real, that person is going to die. His/her soul is unstable and has a high possibility to be a lost soul when it gets out of that persons' body"

"How many days are left to that person?" Allen asked

"Approximately 1 month…Allen give me tim for a minute"

Allen handed timcanpy to Cross "I'll implant the pictures in tim, so go get some rest" Cross said and he exited the room.

After that Allen went to his room and place the gift to his drawer, Lavi called Allen to have dinner so they decided to go to the cafeteria. Allen ordered the whole menu while Lavi ordered yakiniku and they seated to the vacant table.

"Allen you're going to wait until the final day of that person right?" Lavi asked and started chewing his food

"Yeah…As always, I'll wait for the right time to tell that person that he/she's going to die" he said and also started to eat in high speed but stopped and gave out a heavy sigh.

"What's wrong Allen?"

"Nothing I just can't understand how that person tried to cheat death…I have known someone and right now I'm thinking if they are the same person"

"Allen-kun" Miranda called out. She approached the two while holding Timcanpy

"Here" Miranda handed tim to Allen "Cross-sama said that you will have to go after you finished eating"

"Ok Miranda-san" and with that Miranda bid her farewell to the two. Lavi started fidgeting tim while Allen is still busy drinking his water.

"Allen let's look at the person" without a signal timcanpy opened his mouth and a picture of someone popped out.

Allens' eye widened in surprise and he accidentally dropped the glass his holding that broke into million peices. Lavi looked at Allen that is seems to be very shocked.

A cold sweat is now running down his temple and a flash of memory is making its way to him as he stares on the picture of the girl.

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**REVIEWS please...is it good?**

**WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**


	3. 1 Week

**Sorry for the late update. I do not own -man**

A hand touched his shoulder slightly shaking him awake "Allen are you okay?" Lavi asked with a worried tone.

"Yeah…I'm fine" he said while faking a smile but his hands have betrayed him as it started to shake.

"You're not"

"Maybe it's because I'm just tired that's all" Allen said while scratching the back of his head.

"That's just your excuse…You sucks at lying" Lavi said sternly but he only got a nervous chuckle as an answer. So he decided not to pursue the topic even further and proceeded in looking at the picture.

"Wow…Allen's so lucky the girl is a chick…" Lavi said

"Yeah…" Allen said before walking away.

'_Moyashi's acting weird…do he know the girl?' _Lavi said while looking at the slowly disappearing back of Allen.

***BootsOfDespair***

Day 1

Lenalee's POV

I can feel my body is no longer in my control and slowly my disease is gaining advantage over me. My mother used to have the same disease; it's hereditary in our family. A heart disease, that's the cause of my mother's death 6 years ago. I can't remember that day, maybe because it's very painful for me to remember. Ever since that day I started to dream about a white haired boy, but I cannot see his face because my vision is blurry, all I can remember is his smile after I wake up.

Another boring lecture from our teacher *sigh* (looks out the window). The teacher stopped lecturing and looked at the door, slowly she approached it and talk to the persons behind it.

"Class Listen…We have a new transfer student" the teacher then gave the floor to the new students. A red haired man is the first to come in. _'Strange, he had an eye patch over his right eye'_

"I'm Lavi…nice to meet you all" he said in with a cheeky smile that makes the girls in the classroom to blush. I can hear them whisper 'he's cute'

Lavi looked at the door and gesture the something to the person as if giving him a cue to take the floor. I can hear my heart beat went faster when I saw him, he has a white hair. I cannot see his eyes because his bangs covered it and he is slightly looking down.

"I'm Allen Walker" he said and bowed. _'His name sounds familiar' _It shocked me when he shows his face, not because he has a strange scar but because he looks like an angel. I can really feel all the bloods have rushed up to my face and then he smiles _'Gosh…What an innocent looking smile'_

It's only their first day but they already made a big commotion. The teacher directed them to their seat Lavi is by the window and Allen's seat is next to Lenalee.

"Hi I'm Lenalee Lee" she stretches out her hands towards Allen who is arranging his things. Allen looked at the out stretch hand but he just answered with a 'nice to meet you too' without even taking a glance at her. _'What? He ignored me? Or maybe he's just shy'_

The class started again and Lenalee decided that she'll just talk to Allen later at the break. After the first period is Math. The teacher gave out a very hard question then he called Allen to answer it, everyone looked at him in awe when he answered it with ease. He's not only good at Math; he's also good at English, Science and Music.

Second turns into minute and minute turns into hours, and the day ended. I didn't even have a chance to talk to him. Lenalee heave a sigh. _'tomorrow I'll definitely talk to him' _ she said as she stroll down the empty hall. But what she didn't notice is someone is following her.

End of Lenalee's POV

Allen looked at the girl that is making her way home.

"Lavi, why are you here?" he said while eyeing his red haired friend

"Cause I also have a mission"

"So the bookmen gave you the mission"

***BootsOfDespair***

Day 2

Allen's POV

*sigh* what a tiring day. Here I am sitting alone at the bench behind the school. The scenery is very calming but so boring without a companion. Lavi said that he's going to follow the girl he's assigned to.

_Flashback_

_After the last subject before the lunch break girls started to surround me. They're bombarding me with many questions, mostly about my personal life like 'Do you have a girlfriend, Can we go out some times, what do you like' sigh._

"_Allen, you seemed so popular with girls" Lavi said while trying to make his way towards me._

"_Help me Lavi" I said in a whisper_

_After an hour I finally got away. We decided to sit at the bench _

"_Allen you're so popular, even in the Dark Soul Society the girls, they send you gifts" _

"_That's only because I helped them, that's all" _

"_Makes me jealous" then he walked away saying 'he's going to the girl he's assigned to'_

_End of Flashback_

That's why I'm here, oh yeah before I forget I didn't even take a single bite and now I'm getting hungry. And also I need to think a strategy to take that girl's soul. _'I can't even look at her without my blood boiling in hatred, but there is also a strange feeling inside me that I cannot understand whenever I see her' _My thought is interrupted by an added weight beside me in the bench, it means there's someone sitting next to me.

"Hello" a feminine voice said, I didn't even have to look at her to know her identity.

End of Allen's POV

Allen twitches slightly upon hearing the girl. Lenalee looked at him full of curiosity and redirected her view at the sky. There is an awkward silence, no exchange of words have been done between the two of them. Lenalee glance at the boy who is looking at anything except her, but when she's about to open her mouth

"If you're not going to say something, I'll be going now" he said with a gentle tone even though the choice of words was kinda harsh. He lifted himself and started to walk away.

"Wait!" Lenalee called and try to catch up to him "I just wanted to ask you if you can eat with me?" she said while fidgeting her fingers. He stopped and look back at her, he's about to talk when a growl emerge from his hungry stomach.

A blush is now visible at his pale cheeks, the girl find it futile to stop herself from giggling.

"So what's your answer?" she said to the blushing boy. _'Cute'_

He nodded in answer and started to walk again. "Are you just going to stand there?"

"Ah! Right…Let's go" she said and catching up to Allen _'This is the start of our friendship'_

At the cafeteria

Allen ordered a menu that can feed a battalion of hungry soldiers while on the other hand Lenalee sweat dropped at the amount Allen ordered. _'So many'_

Allen looked around for a vacant seat and saw Lavi with a raven haired girl or that's the way he saw that person.

"Lenalee, The seat over where Lavi is, is vacant"

"Let's sit there" Lenalee walk towards Lavi's table but stopped by Allen "What is it?"

"Do you know who's that girl is?" pointing at the raven haired girl(that's what he thinks) with Lavi

"I think you're gonna get it when he hears you, that's definitely a man"

"No way"

"Yes, He's Kanda Yu

Allen decided not to join Lavi and just ask him later. The lunch break ended without an exchange of words between Lenalee and Allen, because every time Lenalee would start a conversation Allen finds a way to end it.

***BootsOfDespair***

"Lavi I thought you're gonna guide the girl you're assigned to?"

"Allen, am I the unluckiest shinigami in the world, that ain't a girl that's a man" Lavi almost shouted at the ended of his statement.

"What are you talking about?" _'Don't tell me that person I saw with him is the-' _Allen didn't finish his train of thoughts when Lavi interrupted

"Apparently they made a mistake and send me to a man, they mistaken him for a woman"

"Eh!What did Bookmen said?" _'I really pity you Lavi'_

"He said it's an experience, jr" Lavi whined and a fake tears started flowing from his eyes. "What is so good at kissing a boy" Lavi is literally weeping right now.

***BootsOfDespair***

The Remaining Days of the First week

Allen is still avoiding Lenalee and never talks to her but also follows her where ever she goes, Lavi is following around Kanda even though he don't want to.

Lenalee is starting to wonder why of all the people she's the only one that Allen never talks to. And she also wonders why she's attach to him, maybe because she's always dreaming about a white haired boy and she's thinking that Allen and that boy is the same. But maybe next week something between them will start to change.

**Next week a relationship will blossom**

**REVIEWS!please**


	4. Week 2

**Ok at last I finished this...it's only part one...enjoy reading...**

**LenaleexAllen**

**I do not own -man...**

Week 2

Day 1

Lenalee's POV

It's been 10 minutes since the school bell rang indicating that the classes are over. All my classmates are gone even him, he always bid his farewell to them but not me. Why? I glance out the window and saw dark clouds forming saying that anytime now it would start raining. I snapped back to reality when thunder and lightning emerge, I quickly packed my things and ran to the gate. I just remembered that after 15 minutes that the school bell rings student must be outside because the club activities are closed and there's a meeting to be held. When I reached the gate and stepped outside the rain starts pouring _'Are you kidding me?'_ Good thing that it's still just droplets because I forgot my umbrella. I started to run when the small drops of water hits the ground in an increasing speed, increasing every second. _'I still got 2 kilometers to walk' _I brush away the water on my face and pant heavily. I stopped a little and glance upward _'The rain it's not stopping' _I looked down because water started to fall to my eyes.

'_So cold, I cannot move my body' _I stopped running again, this time I'm catching my breath furiously. _'I'm really gonna get sick' _my train of thoughts is halted by the stopping of the rain _'No it didn't stop, why only at the spot I'm in?' _my panting didn't stopped and I feel like my heart is going to stop pumping anytime now.

"You're going to get sick, if you stay like that" the boy said while holding the umbrella to me, I looked up to him to see his face _'Allen-kun…' _my eyelids started to get heavyand before I knew it, it's black and white.

Day 2

I stir awake; my vision is spinning when I tried to sit, so I just lay to my bed _'To my bed?' _I looked around and yes it is indeed our house, but how on earth? Then I just remembered that I blacked out on the way home and the image I saw is Allen-kun…holding an umbrella for me…_Allen-kun…_

My thoughts were interrupted by the knocking on the door.

"Lenalee? It's me nii-san" he opened the door and revealed the tray of food that he's holding.

"Nii-san" I said in a weak voice. He approached me with worry imprinted on his eyes _'I don't want to see you like that nii-san'_

"Here is your breakfast" he laid the tray on the desk beside me and then he gave out a warm smile as he reached for my hands "I'm very worried…Your classmate carried you here" I can see tears is started to form under his eyes. I wrapped my hands on his own and put on a gentle but fake smile

"I'm sorry brother, I'm such a burden to you" I glance at the food and glance back to my brother

"Just don't do it again, you're giving your brother a heart attack" he said with a little ruffling of my hair and then leaves with a smile that didn't reach his lips

My brother always smiles at me warmly, my classmates also smiles at me but why is _his_ smiles so fake when it was me whose he is smiling to?

***BootsOfDespaire***

It's already afternoon and I think the class is also finish by now. I think I'm getting sicker with this laying all day long. A sigh escaped my lips *BUZZ**BUZZ* the door bell interrupted my soon to be thoughts.

"It's you again! What do you want?" I heard my brother muttered, in his tone it sounds cheerful but it has a hidden meaning.

"I'm just here to give the lessons to her" when I heard the voice I hurriedly run off to the door where the conversation is occurring.

I saw him handing the papers to my brother "Wait!" I called out. Allen looked back at me quite surprise, to see me running? maybe.

"Lenalee, you shouldn't force yourself" my brother quickly took hold of me when I'm about to stumble.

"Sorry…" I muttered to my brother, and then looked back at Allen "I wanted to thank you for today and for yesterday".

"Don't mention it, I'll be going now" he said and started to walk away.

"Wait, would you be happy to join us for dinner" my brother said making him stop at his tracks.

"Yeah, T-this is like a token of my thanks…to you Allen-kun" he looked back at us; I approached him, hold onto his arms and started dragging him inside the house.

"E-excuse me for intruding" he said being formal before we completely go inside.

I'm slightly feeling ok right now, maybe because I got much rest for this day. I helped my brother in serving, Allen insisted to help but my brother didn't agree with him because he's our visitor.

We started eating, everyone is silent and I'm not used to it so I'll try to make a conversation.

"Allen-kun, how do you know that I lived here?" I saw a twitch from him and my brother didn't noticed it

"I saw it on your i.d, I just followed the address" he answered

"Oh!" even though I saw a twitch from him I shrugged it off maybe it's just…nothing?

After eating Allen excused himself say his goodbyes and thank you…

Day 3

I'm feeling a-ok right now so I decided to go to school. Right now at this very moment we are in the Physical education class, swimming. Our teacher instructed us to swim for at least 10 meters then we can do whatever we want, this is the practical exam for this semester. Everyone in the class have finished their practical exam and now just enjoying the water at the pool.

Our teacher excused himself for a minute to get something to eat. I stepped into the pool but stayed on the corner because it's too deep and too exhausting for me to swim again. I thought everything will be ok but then my heart started to ache, I felt one of my attacks coming on. I clench my fist over my chest and started to hyperventilate and couldn't breathe. I was beginning to black out. I let go on my support on the pool side, all I can mutter is 'help'.

'_Is it already my time?' _Then I felt a gust of air coming inside my throat and a thrusting over my chest. A blurry image is heading towards me. That's when I realized that someone is giving me air. I started coughing and pulled myself on sitting position. Beside me are Allen and my other classmates in a worried face.

"Lenalee! You almost killed us there" one of my classmates said

"If it weren't for Allen you could have-" the girl was stopped by the sudden move of the said person. I looked at his back as he walks away.

"What happened here?" our teacher called out while panting heavily. He runs toward me "Ms. Lee. Are you alright?" he said and holds my arm, slowly pulls me up. "Everyone the class is over, Ms. Lee you need to go to the infirmary"

End of Lenalee's POV

Allen's POV

'_Why did I help her?' _I watched as the girl is being dragged by our teacher to the infirmary. I felt a hand rested other my shoulder.

"Allen, you know you shouldn't interfere" Lavi said

"I know, it's not yet her time…She got at least 2 more weeks to live" I said unconsciously

"But you know you almost kissed her, be careful" he said in a serious tone "Don't let your emotion gets into you" he said walking away.

"I wouldn't" I muttered.

End of Allen's POV

Day 4

Lenalee's brother didn't allow her to go to school and insisted that she'll have check up. The trip to the hospital from her house is as easy as can be so she told her brother that she'll be going alone.

The doctors started interviewing her for about 20 minutes and for a further examination the doctor suggested to have her examined using ECG(Electrocardiography). Lenalee waited patiently at the waiting room, a cold sweat run down her temples as she waited for the results. She knows that she inherited her disease from her mother.

The door on the waiting room opened, Lenalee revert her view to see the doctor. By just merely looking at the doctor she can say that the examination shows a bad result. The doctor arranges his eyeglasses as he stared at the piece of paper he is holding.

" I would like to suggest you to be confined here for the following days" a tone of concern escaped the doctor's lips.

She can only answer in silence, as a wet sensation in her eyes is about to emerge.

"You have Myocardial Infarction and it's now on acute stage" she can only stare at the doctor waiting for him to continue. "Myocardial infarction happens if a portion of the myocardium undergoes necrosis and can no longer contract. These portions of the myocardium can no longer generate force, resulting in weakening of the ventricle. If the areas of infarction are extensive, congestive heart failure results" The doctor shows the paper to her but she gently shook it away.

"Doctor, h-how l-long?" she choked between words, as the tears started flowing non-stop. She gently gripped the shoulder of the doctor.

"…" the doctor heave out a heavy sigh "about 1 month" the words echoed to her head over and over

***BootsOfDespair***

Her hands hanging limply at her sides as she stares into nothingness. It's been an hour ago since she left the hospital; she didn't want her brother to notice the bloodshot eyes of her, so she decided to pass time at the park.

'_So I'll die very soon…how can I tell this to brother?' a heavy sigh escaped her lips._

After an hour her eyes doesn't hurt anymore. Lenalee decided to go back home.

"Nii-san, I'm back" she called out

"Lenalee, what happened? What did the doctor said?" he asked as he approaches me with his eyes full of concern.

"It's fine, I'm just tired the doctor said" Lenalee said while waving her hands in front of her. Komui let out a sigh of relief.

"You need to rest now" Komui puts his hands to Lenalee's shoulder. And she nodded in agreement.

Lenalee sat down at her study table deep in thought. Tears started flowing from her eyes _'What would I do? How can I stop the tears form flowing?' _She broke down into silent sobs. Lenalee cross her arms on the desk and laid her head on it.

***BootsOfDespair***

Day 5

Lenalee opened her eyes as a cool breeze brushes her skin. She finds herself on her bed; Lenalee looked at the unlocked window and close it. And it's still early in the morning about 4 a.m

'_I don't remember crawling onto my bed or maybe I did I just forgot about it'_ she shrug it off and drifted to the sweet slumber

Allen's POV

Just above Lenalee's house [at the air floating]

'_Stupid girl sleeping on her desk while her window is still open, did she wanted to die sooner than her real time' _I looked at the golden golem beside me

"Tim why are you here? Did master want something?" Timcanpy nodded and showed a hologram.

In the hologram there is a sand clock, the sand is getting faster than before but then some will go back up. The view change to a man with red hair sipping some wine

"Allen, you need to watch carefully at that girl. Her soul is very unstable, if this keeps up she'll turn into an akuma" Cross said then the hologram stopped.

"Tim, what does that mean?" I asked the golem but didn't receive a reply.

"That means you have to perform the ceremony properly so that her soul will not become an akuma" **[if ever you forgot the ceremony is the Kiss] **Lavi approached me.

"…"

"Allen, you're planning to wait until it's her last day right?"

"I don't want to get the remaining days from her…And that's what I always do….She's not an exception" I said "If God gave her a month to live, I will not oppose that" I added

"Even though you're really cold towards her"

I raised an eyebrow as I look at him "Why do you say so?" asked slightly confused. I know where this talk is getting to.

"I mean…you don't talk to her, while in you other missions you'll always have a good chat with the others"

"…" I don't really want to answer that question, I looked away.

"Why Allen? Is it something about your past?"

Bingo that got me off guard and I think he saw the flinch. "I don't want to talk about it…"

"It's something about the past…Don't worry I won't trouble you much….Well I have my on mission" he said as he wave goodbye.

**REVIEWS PLEASE**


	5. Week 3

**Sorry for the late update...*bow down* I'm just going to tell you guys that I'll be ending this story soon...thank you for your support for all those who reviewed and have added my story to their favorites...**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter...LenaleexAllen...and this is really dramatic...next chapter there will be more drama...**

**I do not own -man**

Day 6

Lenalee's POV

I hate it, my body, I'm weak. I can feel the warm liquid rolling down my cheeks; I didn't know I was crying until I tasted the salty wate+r on my mouth. In front of me is my brother with a shocked expression. I know he's going to cry I don't want to see it, _no God please. _He just found out my secret, he looked at my drawer and saw the test result from the hospital.

"Lenalee…" he muttered rather weak, tears falling. He grabbed me into a tight hug, I don't want to be vulnerable in his eyes but I broke down. I choked between sobs; my brother isn't saying anything he just cries.

"nii-san I'm sorry" I finally said, it's my fault why he's crying and in pain like this. "I'm so sorry"

I felt his hug tense up and he took a deep breath in "No…Lenalee you're not at fault"

"What should I do brother I don't want to die yet" I said as I hugged him back. "I don't w-want to d-die" he started to comfort me. My brother he's so warm, I want to stay with my brother. "I don't" my tears stopped me from saying anything else.

"Lenalee, forgive me I couldn't do anything, I'm useless" I can hear my brother sob.

"nii-san, I will be staying at the hospital" I said breaking the hug _'I want to live'_

"…" my brother didn't say a word but gave me his warm smile and he patted my head.

Day 7

The doctor run many test on me and confined me on the hospital _'It's for the best' _beside me is my brother, worry imprinted on his face.

"Ms. Lee will be staying here for her recovery until we find a heart donor" _'Inside me I know that I'll never find one and if I did it will be too late' _before I become a pessimistic girl right now I was once an optimistic girl that lives life to the fullest, _But how can I do that when I know I'm dying? _I inwardly smile to myself.

"Lenalee, nii-san will be going now" he said in a sad tone, I know he doesn't want to go but he have a job.

"See you nii-san" but I know he'll come back.

Its 3:00 pm I don't want to just lay here _'I wanted to see my friends, I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye to-' _my thought is stopped by the opening of the door. Why are you here? That's what I wanted to ask him but change my mind instead I just smiled at him.

"You're in a situation like that, but you can still smile" he said as he approached me with a notebook on his hands.

"How did you know?" I asked and he just stares at the outside window.

"I know everything" he just simply says. Then without further ado he leaves.

WEEK 3

Lenalee's POV

My brother already told my teachers that I'll be staying at the hospital until I'm well. I cannot think of a way to entertain myself. I don't have any companions here to talk to, the doctors or nurse will just go and check on me and I'm not allowed to go outside alone because I might strain my heart _'Is that how weak I'm now? I don't know, I just know I'm dying' _I can feel that every positive things in my life is fading before my eyes. My hopes of being alive crumble each time I would have an attack. A knock emerges and stopped my thoughts.

"Come In" I said

The person I wouldn't expect to come is here before my eyes. Why are you here again? Again I wanted to ask but change my mind.

"How are you?" he asked while sitting beside my bed

"I-I'm fine" he just answered in an 'hmm' he had something on his hands. He looks at me when he notices I'm staring at him and what he's holding.

"You know how to make origami?" he asked while slightly lifting the origami paper.

"Yes why do you ask?"

"School project…I don't know how to make some, can you teach me?" _'I love origami! But I'm not on the condition to play something…'_

He stares outside the window _'Why? You're always like that; you're always giving me the feeling of being unseen, being dead…Yes, dead.' _And without my knowledge warm liquid started flowing down my cheeks.

Frustration, despair, agony, solitude all at once she felt it, she felt for the first time like she had no friend at all. This getting sick thing is really straining her not just physically and mentally but also emotionally.

"This so cruel, why do I have to die? Why do I have to leave this world earlier than my brother?" I covered my face using my palm, asking for its protection.

"Did god despise me?" I said rather weakly

"Human just can't accept their death" he muttered harshly "They're frail and easily broke down"

"You're saying it as if you're not one of us" How can he say that! I started to glare at him. "You didn't know, you didn't experience it, you don't know how painful it is to leave someone" my tears they cannot stop falling

"I did…but I don't remember, and I have seen them…One by one dying" he looks nothing in particular, just by looking at his silver-blue eyes covered with a smug of sorrow I felt the pang of guilt strikes through me, I was taken aback. Somehow I know that what I said is harsh I know that, I easily give up _'I'm wrong, I know 'I'm wrong…I'm so weak to accept the faith that God entrusted me'_

"Death is not human's enemy it's indifference. From the moment people are born they're dying, and you're not an exception" he said sternly. The room started spinning around, no it's not spinning my head it just hurts like hell and my chest is started to get heavy, I started to hyperventilate

I looked at his shocked face as darkness slowly overtaken my whole system.

Allen's POV

I panicked when I saw her gasping for air, she fell unconscious and I called the doctor.

I went to the park after I leave the hospital and saw Lavi. He looked so down while he sits at the swing limply. I sat at the swing beside him, he didn't react he just look at me with lazy eyes and it's bloodshot.

"What's wrong?" I asked _'I never saw him like this before'_

"…" his head still bowed and his bangs covered the only visible eye.

"What happened?" when I looked around he's alone _'He's always with Kanda…Don't tell me?'_

"Allen I have to go back" he said in a lamenting voice, he then look up the sky and a fake smile is plastered on his face. "Allen, don't make something that you'll regret in the end"

"What do you mean Lavi?"

"If you have something to say to her say it already. Tell her what you feel"

'_Lavi even though you said that, I'm afraid I cannot understand my own feelings. . I said to myself that she lied to me before then she cannot remember me anymore I wanted to be angry at her. I don't want to look at her eyes; I don't want to hear her voice. Because If I did look into her eyes it's pleading to help her and whenever I hear her voice I wanted for it to last, so I just watched her from afar even though I wanted to stay by her side' _That's when I realized some things and let a single tear rolled down my cheek.

That ends our conversation that day. I learned that Kanda's time stopped clicking this very day, Lavi returned to our world.

End of Allen's POV

Lenalee's POV

I'm awakened by the radiating light coming from the window. And slowly I opened my eyes, I started adjusting my blurry vision and finally I can shape out my brother sitting beside my bed. I know I was having some kind of dream or maybe a memory of my childhood. My vision is blurry so I couldn't really recognize the person talking to me, all I know is that I'm in my child form then the kid has white hair – just like Allen-kun.

"Nii-san…" I said in a hitch tone

"Lenalee, you really worried me there…" he let out a sigh of relief. My eyes started to wander around the room, looking for someone.

"Nii-san where is Allen-kun?" I asked _'How long did I sleep? I don't know maybe for an hour, or maybe it took me days or weeks probably?'_

"How long I was out?" I asked my brother. He held my hands and tightens its grip a little, with a reassuring smile.

"J-just for two days"

'oh' that's the only thing I could muster. "Nii-san what if one day I didn't wake up?" I just couldn't understand why did I blurted out such words but it just came out. I stare at my brother's shaking figure. He looked like deep in thought then he suddenly change his mood and smiled to me.

"Don't say that Lenalee…You're going to be fine" he said slightly patting my head.

***BootsOfDespair***

I keep on saying that I have to accept this fate, I just have to be strong but my body is failing me always…Slowly I'm getting weaker. I heard a conversation outside that halted my thoughts

"Why don't you go inside?" I definitely know whose voice is that _'nii-san…who is he talking to?'_

"I-I think I should go Komui-san" when I heard the voice the memories came back, is he here to lecture me again?

The door sprang open revealing my brother and Allen-kun, my brother is pushing him to go inside.

"Lenalee, your classmate is here, Allen-kun(he shoved Allen inside the room)…Brother is just going to buy some apples" My brother waved goodbye rather cheerful but still there's a glint of murderous intent in his eyes as he leave me and Allen-kun alone_ '*sigh*, nii-san'_

"I'm just here to check if you're okay, I think I said some harsh words to you last day…Please accept my apology" he said as he bowed

"But that's really harsh words you know" I said teasingly _'This is payback time, that made me sleep for two days'_

He looked taken aback from my words, and I smirked mentally _'Wow, I can still smile even in this weak state…'_

"Uhm…Do you have something there for me?" I asked as I looked at his hands that is holding something behind his back.

"T-this is just for saying sorry" he then gave me a swan origami, it's cute and it made me smile

"Thank you…" I felt myself blush. _'He's being too nice to me maybe out of pity?'_

***BootsOfDespair***

I didn't know since when did we starts our very first conversation; this is really what I call a conversation. I started talking to him about different things, opening up. Much to my relief he seems to be listening to what I'm blabbering. Occasionally he'll tell jokes; that will give off pits of laughter from me; I didn't know that he is this kind of person. He's polite and kind, somehow I can forget about me having a disease when I'm with him.

**Allen came to realize that being with Lenalee is what he yearned the most...really sad because Lenalee can't remember him...**

**Reviews please..**


	6. False Hope

**Sorry for the delay, I've been through a lot this month...**

**I do not own -man...AllenxLenalee**

Komui's POV

"Ms. Lee's condition is getting worse…We have to find a heart donor immediately" the doctor said. _'I don't understand, why does it have to be Lenalee?'_

I walked towards the room where Lenalee's located but I stopped my track before I could enter the room. I heard a soft giggle; I know it's coming from Lenalee. I took a peek and saw Allen. _'What's with this lad? He's always here…If he's planning to get my dear Lenalee away from me I wouldn't ALLOW THAT!' _But then while looking how happy Lenalee is right now; it makes me want to smile.

"Ahem" I started off and my action really catch their attention

"Nii-san, you're here…Allen-kun is just telling jokes before you came in, do you want to hear it?" my dear Lenalee said with eyes of enthusiasm. I narrowed my eyes slightly at Allen _'What kind of green jokes are you telling my DEAR ADORABLE LITTLE SISTER!' _But then I flash a smile before Lenalee could notice my glare

"So Allen-kun~~~ Can you tell me that jokes of yours" I said to the flinching form of Allen

"Uhmm…er…I think I should be going now…" He said while trying to make an escape towards the door, but I wouldn't allow that so I grabbed him by the collar and excused us to Lenalee.

I started off with adjusting my glasses "Are you by chances is courting my LITTLE ADORABLE SISTER?" when I said that words I think I finally hit the jackpot, the lad in front of me is now twitching and sweating badly

"Uhmm..sir..I mean Komui-san-" I halted what he's going to say by resting my hands on his shaking shoulder

"If you're planning to do something bad to my dearest little sister…You'll be six feet under the ground" I said sternly while adding a little grim background

"I r-really n-not p-planning so-mething bad Komui-san…I just..just" he trailed off

"Just don't make my sister cry ok?" I said releasing him from my grasp that I didn't even noticed, tighten a little while.

"Eh" he has this confused look plastered on his face

"I don't like you flirting with my pure Lenalee but I also don't like to cut off the only reason she's smiling right now"

***BootsOfDespair***

Lenalee's POV

The silence is killing me to its extent. Being alone in the hospital ward is really boring _'I wish my brother is here or maybe…Allen-kun' _I blushed at the thought of being here alone with Allen-kun. I brushed the thought off and a sigh escaped my lips.** [she's sighing a lot]**

I thought it will be a peaceful day until my heart started beating rapidly and I start hyperventilating _'An attack' _hands formed a fist on my chest, gripping it tightly while I started to search for the emergency button located beside my bed. But my vision is giving out and I couldn't see anything.

"Lenalee!" I heard a voice called out_. 'Nii-san…'_

"Lenalee hang in there, Doctor!" my brother called out.

***BootsOfDespair***

"Lenalee, I'm just going to talk to the doctor ok" nii-san said walking towards the door.

"Oh, Allen-kun you're here now" he said in a cheery tone "I'll be going now" he said as he wave goodbye but not before he leaves a glare to Allen, that he think I never notice before.

"Sorry about that" I said as sigh escaped my lips

"About what?" he asked as if it's nothing happened

"Allen-kun, of course my brother" a giggle started to emerge and lips is now twitching upward _'It's almost like a natural reaction whenever he's around me'_

I stared at he's smile like almost remembering every detail of it, but I think it's not a good exercise for my heart cause it started beating rapidly. To ease the pain I forcibly looked outside the window. _'It's so funny how a frail and vulnerable heart of mine can still function like that' _my thoughts are suddenly halted by the opening of the door

Me and Allen-kun looked at the door where a panting and sweat stricken, nii-san is standing but beyond his appearance he has a smile plastered on his face.

"Lenalee!Lenalee…you have a heart donor" he said as he beamed into to me._' I cannot believe what my ears are hearing…He just actually said that I have a heart donor'_

"I-s that true?" I asked and I cannot help but to clench the cloth of the hospital bed. My brother approached almost tumbling.

"Yes, Lenalee…" my brother hugged my tightly and stroked my hair gingerly.

My brother released from his breath taking hugand as I looked up, I can to see Allen looking at me with a smile painted on his face but I cannot understand his reaction, I cannot grasp what he's thinking right now. He is smiling but at the same time mourning, for what? Isn't he happy for me?

"Allen-kun…" I said and he flinched a little

"Lenalee, I'm so happy for you" he said as he reached out, I didn't know that I cried and tears started falling and he brushed it away with his soft and warm fingers. "I'm just going to buy some juice for us" he said with an assuring smile.

I stared at his back_ 'Something is bothering him'_

***BootdOfDespair***

Allen's POV

I cannot stand being there, pretending to be happy about the news, when I know too well that she'll die no matter what. I cannot tell her that it's futile, that believing in a false hope will just prolong her suffering. I punched the nearest wall I can see, good thing that there's nobody around that time or they'll think I'm a retard. My punch leaves a crack on the wall without leaving any scratch on my fist **[of course don't forget Allen is a shinigami and not a normal being]**

But then my right eye suddenly activated. I never mentioned before that when my eye activate I sense an akuma nearby. A dread feeling suddenly formed into my stomach almost like twisting my insides.

"They're after Lenalee"

I ran as fast as I can. Akuma they are the product of a lost soul. They eat the souls of those people close to being dead, and seeing how powerful and unstable Lenalee's soul she's the greatest victim.

**It's really short...I decided to make it a little longer...What will happen to Lenalee?**

**Preview**

**A secret is revealed, he has no choice he have to save her but now she knows who really is will she accept him. Will she finally remember him when they were a child.**

**Allen: REVIEWS PLEASE**


	7. AUTHOR'S NOTE

NOTE:

My deepest apology to all those people reading this…I'm so sorry I have to put this into a temporary hiatus…

It's just that I'm very busy with school and stuffs…and the primary reason for this temporary hiatus was, I cannot think of a better ending…Don't worry I won't let you guys hanging for too long. Just need time to think.

Yours truly,

Kumiko Yoshikuni A.K.A BootsOfDespair


End file.
